Through this letter, I want to express my admiration on how you handle the fight against the Coronavirus. You latest recommendation really made me feel so much safer in dealing with the virus on a day to day basis. Injecting disinfectant inside the body seems to me the most sensible solution. I can do this myself at home. When it works on the outside why not on the inside. It is logical, really, this makes sense, why didn’t anyone else think of this before. Who needs scientists when the solution is so clear and simple. It is so very obvious why you are the president.
Your creativity in your fight against this airborne virus is incredibly inspiring and it got me thinking…. In addition to the injections with disinfectant, I thought we can try to wring the virus out of the body. Like with this mangle. After the disinfectant did its job and killed off all the virus in just one minute, wringing the stuff out seems to me like the most logical next step, don’t you agree?
This particular model is very unique. The standard handle was a bit too big so a brand-new handle is specially made for you because your hands are so delicate and small. I mean, when you want the disinfecting and the mangling done right, you better do it yourself, isn’t it?
The inhabitants of the abandoned island of Stroma want to donate this mangle to your very good cause. Although they could use is in their own country, the inhabitants of Stroma want you to have it. You have been so generous with giving respirators and hygiene materials to other countries even though the hospitals in your own country are desperate for these items. It is a clear sign of altruism to just to give them away. It is that spirit the inhabitants of Stroma will part from this life-saving mangle and donate it to your fight against the Coronavirus.
Since you have many golf courses in Scotland and have your own aeroplane, picking up this generously donated item won’t be a problem I expect? Stroma is the first island on the north-east side of Scotland and it got a very good landing strip. You will receive a warm welcome upon arrival by the locals, just be careful with the sheep when you land. And don’t take the bleating too personal it is just the local accent.